KSSU? What is that and what is that they do? These were a couple of thoughts I had when I first found out about KSSU. I knew that would appear at sac state events and would be playing music and I honestly at first, was a little thrown by the music they were playing. I use to always look and wonder, what are they doing over there? I had no idea that sometime later I would be seeking volunteer opportunities with KSSU. As the new kid on the block, I like to say that my experience thus far is a plethora of emotions.
My emotional range goes from me being excited, ecstatic, and over-joyed to finally get my voice out there, all the while feeling nervous, anxious and fearful for how it all is going to go. The thing is, it’s been awhile since I’ve been comfortable speaking up and voicing my opinion about certain things, I’m usually a quiet observer who tends to over-think the simplest of issues. Much of my problems I find are self-inflicted and I can be my own worst enemy, often times reacting instead of taking action (acting). For awhile I’ve been depressed and worried/fearful of being wrong and saying the wrong thing but I’m understanding more and more that no one is perfect. That to having to always be right is an exhausting job and that perfection is something that unattainable as long as difference exist. I’m learning how to trust my self, my knowledge, my judgement and most importantly the morals/wisdom/values I’ve been taught since I was young.
Being an independent, college student has shown me things about myself that have begun to liberate me. Not only am I an insightful person who only wishes to see those around me thrive, but there is more good qualities about me than bad ones. It’s taken me awhile to adjust to the present and ignore the past but I’m making strides. I promised myself this year that I would let go of the old and make room for the new because the opinions and judgements made by others are just words and nothing more. I’m moving towards a place where I can accept who I am and express myself without the need of others consent.I find KSSU is a place for me to be me! All I want to share my views on what I have to come to understand about life and other things and hopefully it touches someone.
So far I’m experiencing different personalities meshing well together in an environment that is supports creativity and expression from it’s volunteers. In addition, KSSU is a place that is very much a community; a community to where they look out for everyone and are there to ensure your success. I love these kinds of environments; I appreciate the flexibility, openness, and vibes that KSSU is fostering.
I only hope that as I continue down this path with KSSU that in the coming months I will be content with myself first and foremost. Then say to myself “OK, I accept who I am but I’m not satisfied until I achieve the personal goals I have for myself”.
Alonzo is a DJ with Sacramento States only Student Run radio station KSSU